Monday, September 21, 2009

Cheers and Boom Boom Pow To The Nation...Suckers

We'll pause for a moment of silence for Maryland, Duke and Virginia. Not because they're programs are dying (they are) but because for the next week we will not be discussing them as they are clearly raining all over the ACC's parade toward respectability. They're like the fat, haggard friend in a night club. Sure they make VT, Da U and Clemson look better but in the end they're the ones who stop you from getting to the VIP.

Translation, MD, Duke and UVA, please go home early because the rest of the league is trying to hit the VIP harder than Chris Brown popped Rihanna. On a related note UVA @ Maryland homecoming in College Park on October 17th should be the pillow fight of the year, and not the sorority house slumber party type.

Now on to the teams that are carrying the torch, NC State you only get a slight head nod because you beat the Bulldogs, of Gardner-Webb. UNC a slightly noddier head nod for beating ECU, a team that hates us but doesn't realize we don't care.

Finally we get to the awesomeness that is the rest of the league. GT your time for torch carrying is over but thanks for the top 15 ranking, we'll be blowing out your candle and thank you for making Miami's shine brighter as the Canes jump to #9 in the nation.

Da UuUUuUUUUUUUuU is on the verge of being back and thanks to Jacory Harris their offense looks to be among the nations elite. There are girls in thongs on South Beach who are auditioning to be part of this new Canes era. The 7th floor won't be enough to contain how nasty these Canes are right now and heading into this weeks game against VT I'm hoping Coral Gables is prepared with enough Grey Goose, Alaze and Magnums to contain the celebration.

Speaking of the Hokies, they escape against Nebraska and that is just enough for Beamer. Tyrod Taylor proves that while completely inept for the entire game his scrambling ability are still adequate enough to make Nebraska decide that rushing the quarterback is an optional task, leaving Taylor all day to find a wide open man. Hokie Hi will definitely need to find some offense against the UUuuUuuUuuuUuuUU but hey having two league teams in the top 15 ain't bad sucka duck.

Right outside the top 15 nestled in at #18 is the FSU "almost back to" Crimi-Noles. They beat the hell out of the fighting Mormons and Bronco Mendenhall. For the Noles first five possessions it looked like the Cougs were still on their two year missions as FSU scored at will. Just a week removed from narrowly beating the Gamecocks of Jacksonville State the Noles pounded #9 BYU into absolute submission.

Sidenote, games on VS blow. The announcers have such a MWC slant I wanted to alternate between puking and punchisizing their larynxes. I hate VS.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry